First time for everything... (Dear Dad)

I have found, from both personal experience and from observation, that much of what people chase in life usually has less to do with the tangible object or event they claim to be seeking, and more to do with the initial emotions felt from the first time they experienced said event or object. Drug addicts chase the first high, codependents chase the butterflies, adrenalin junkies chase the rush…regardless of what exactly it is you seek, it would seem that most of our desires are not as much about the corporeal object or event, but rather they are more deeply rooted in what we felt the “first time”.

Unfortunately, it is those emotions that we seek that have in fact jaded us to all future experiences. Sensory deprivation kicks in and from then on nothing will ever feel the way it did that first glorious time.

In my pursuit to experience all that this continent has to offer I have often feared that those feelings I got the first time I stepped on to the ice would eventually fade into familiarity, and as is suggested by some, the familiarity would breed contempt. While I have come across the contempt of others, I cannot imagine there ever being a day that I could share in that disdain. I am, in fact, proud to report that I am far from familiar with the majesty that surrounds me - the disregard that some have claimed will eventually come my way is not even present on the farthest horizon.

That being said, when I finished with work today, I could think of nothing more than running to the top of Ob Hill. Its only 800 ft above town, and the trail itself is only about a mile, but its still amazing to me that trekking such a short distance from town seems to transport you to a different world. Looking at the same mountains, from a different perspective, makes them look like completely different mountains. Looking down on the seemingly large buildings of McMurdo from 800 ft. up makes them look insignificant with hundreds of miles of ice extending beyond them.

So with iPod in tow, earphones in and a hiking buddy at at my side, we started the trek to the top, to Scott’s Cross. A cross that was erected in memory of Robert Falcon Scott, an explorer who lost his life in his journey to the South Pole. The base of the cross has been buried deep into the summit but from the ground it often looks like it has been suspended from heaven, which makes it, not only a great marker for the summit, but also a great allusion to our destination.

I have done this hike quite a few times now and, as I mentioned before, I have always carried with me a concern that the views to be had would eventually be nothing more then mundane. In an attempt to reassure myself that that day is far off, I have made the habit of stopping and turning around every hundred or so feet to see the amazing sight that lies before me…and I just can't believe that it will ever get old.

A few feet away from the top I sopped and turned to see a sight that I am sure has been the inspiration for scientists, explorers, artists and the like for years. You can see for hundreds of miles. Ice for hundreds of miles, and contrary to popular belief, color for hundreds of miles. Everything is covered in ice and snow, yes, but in that ice and snow and dangling in the sky is every shade of blue, pink, and purple that you could possibly imagine. Everything seems far grander here. The sun is a different sun: brighter, warmer, and powerfully energizing with every blinding glance towards its center. The breadth of ice and snow that unrolls before you puts into perspective how insignificant we are in the grand scheme of the world. It’s a sight that no human could ever convey to another, a sight that no camera could ever capture, no artist could ever do justice… and there I stood at what felt like the top of it all…

My iPod changed songs and the rolling notes of Elvis Presley’s “Only Fools Rush In” made a surprisingly fitting soundtrack. The sights of the moment began to mingle with my memories of the past. Like playing back a movie, I could remember my father singing along to this song as we drove down the road to the next destination, on whatever road trip we may have been on. I could remember traveling with him to all sorts of amazing places, and I could remember that everywhere we went his camera was always close at his side, ready to be drawn. I remember there would be times when he could spend hours in one spot taking pictures, and I remember that there were times that I didn’t know what he was taking pictures of but every picture always came out perfectly. It occurred to me in this moment that my father is the reason why, as long as I live, every time will be the first time. Every time, no matter how many times, will always be the first. Whether it was developed by the grace of genetics or just the times I chose to listen to the wisest man I have ever known, I can now see beauty in everything, beauty all around me. I remember the days that I envied his ability to see beauty in the mundane, and his ability to capture that beauty would rival the greats of the industry. And while my knowledge of a camera will never be what his is, I feel truly blessed that he enabled me with the ability to find wonder and beauty in everything I see.

Elvis keeps singing in my head and his words seem to resonate.

” …as the rivers flow gently to the sea, darling so we go, some things are meant to be, Take my hand, take my whole life too, cause I can’t help falling in love with you”

I’m in love. In love with Antarctica, in love with my life. I think of my past, both the good and the bad, and it occurs to me 800ft above this new place that I can now consider home, that the life I have lived is nothing short of epic. A wonderful life littered with some dark moments, but I have found my way out of the dark, and standing here in the warmth of the sun I can feel only one thing…I made it. I can’t even explain what exactly this metaphysical sensation alludes too, but I made it. Whether it’s a feeling of success or just one of triumph, the meaning at the moment is beyond me and before I can figure it out an overwhelming feeling of gratefulness floods my senses…an appreciation that’s humbling.

Elvis’ voice begins to fade, but the memories of my father, my family, my past, remain. In this moment, in this place of raw wonder, 8,000 miles away from home I feel so close to my father. I will appreciate this place not just for myself but for him. If there is one vow that I can make, its that every second from here forth I will look out over the horizon and strive to see this place through his eyes. I will strive to see this place the way he would, in all of its majestic grandeur. And I truly believe that this is the reason why every time will be the first time…because if he were standing here with me looking at it, even if for the thousandth time, he would still view it with the same enchantment as if it was the first…

Thank you daddy, I miss you and I love you, I’ll be home soon…

Scott's Cross at the top of Observation Hill

“I will love the light for it shows me the way, yet I will endure the darkness because it shows me the stars.”-Og Mandino (Dear Mom)

If this place has taught me anything it has taught me to appreciate the things you have around you. Whether that be fresh fruit and vegetables, days that you don’t have to wear a coat to go outside, or maybe even just a chance to really sit and enjoy a sunrise or sunset…All of those things became very scarce when I arrived here. Going outside without a coat on is far from realistic, the freshies are running low (soon to be a thing of the past) and up until a few weeks ago I hadn’t seen much of the sun let alone watching it rise and set. I did, however see the first sunrise of the season…the sun rose on August 19^th at 12:26pm and set shortly after at exactly 1:30pm…PHENOMENAL might I add…

There is also something to be said for watching the appreciation of others as they experience these things along side you, some of which who have been without fresh food and sun light for upwards of 5 months (winterovers). Their unadulterated appreciation for what most of us take for granted on a daily basis would put most of the world to shame. Even the most deprived of us still view the sun as an ordinary, everyday, unremarkable thing. But here, on more than one occasion I witnessed people gathering, sharing in  blank stares towards the horizon in hopes that today will be the day that it peeks over the mountains. What an amazing example for all of us to live by, to appreciate the simplest things in life…the everyday things.

Weeks have passed now, and the days are noticeably getting longer and the nights are all too quickly getting shorter. I’m sure that my information is not completely correct but the rumor is that we gain between 20 and 40 minutes of light a day which will inevitably leave us with no more night sky, no more sunrises, and no more sunsets…at least not while I’m here. So as I have very quickly realized from the winterovers, now is my chance to appreciate the things that I love the most, the things that I will likely miss the most…the stars, the darkness, the silence, the peace that comes from twilight, the absolution that comes from the blackness before dawn. My time to enjoy it will be short, the last sunset is scheduled for October 23 but they say that the stars stop showing themselves long before that… time to soak up the moon.

(I have heard nothing but amazing things about the night sky in Antarctica. One seasoned veteran informed me that the night sky alone would make the long and ruthless 8-month winter season worth braving. It would seem that between the Auroras, pulsars, and the Milky Way in HD, it would be hard to go outside and not look up. But just as the rest of us take the sun for granted I would imagine that it would be easy to very quickly take the 24 hrs of a night sky for granted as well.)

Even though McMurdo is small compared to what most people consider a “town” it still produces enough light to muffle what the universe has to offer, so the only way to see it in all of its glory, and to possibly catch a glimpse of the legendary auroras, you have to take a field trip. Everyone seems to have a different place that they recommend; I chose the road to Scott Base. There is a bend in the road about half way to the Kiwi base that falls just far enough behind the terrain that all of the ambient light is washed away by pure darkness.

I couldn’t have asked for a better way to start the experience than to see an Aurora, and while it was very dim and lasted only a few moments, I saw one perched just above Scott Base. After days and days of walking outside in hopes of catching one, I finally see one just as I come around the last corner before my destination and just in time. I really do wish that I could attest to the beauty that everyone else claims to see when the Auroras arrive, and while I have no doubt that it is completely true, this Aurora was unfortunately a little too dim for me to maintain or confirm this suggestion. My wonder came more from the fact that I had witnessed it… Aurora Australis: seen it!! The real wonder actually came more in the form of chance than anything else. I sat down on the side of the road at the top of a very steep drop off looking out over what I knew was ice, but at the moment it was very hard to decipher where the gray of the ice stopped and the gray that was the horizon started. Exhausted from the enigma of white in front of me, and still catching my breath from the hike, I collapsed backwards determined to feel some sort of rest. What spanned out in front of me was quite possibly the most amazing thing that I have ever seen in my life. A black that would be impossible to match and the brightest of bright stars hanging from the ceiling of space…so bright, so clear that the twinkling of the stars could actually be seen. So clear that you can see the sky move. Its alive with traveling satellites, shooting stars, and what I’m CONVINCED had to be a UFO or two. The Milky Way rolls out over the sky as if God himself spilt a glass of milk…this glass of milk however, was worth crying over, and while they would absolutely be tears of joy, a sight like this could conjure up tears from even the most bitter of humans.

Perfection and bliss…its so easy to appreciate, if for no other reason than the lack of familiarity. There is something to be said for looking up into a night sky with absolutely no preconceived notion of what you will see. There is no Northern star here…no Big Dipper, no little dipper, no Orion’s Belt. After 24 years on this planet I looked up into a night sky that was completely new and completely foreign. And even though I don’t remember it, I can’t help but feel that this is what it was like the first time I consciously looked to the sky as a child…brand new, peaceful, silent…

It is a statement I have often heard and often neglected to consider until now…but the silence really can be loud. And the silence here is deafening and amazing and forces a sense of peace. It insists, compellingly, that there is nothing in this world more important than what goes on inside your own head and your own heart, because at this moment there is nothing else in the world to be heard but your own desires and doubts…the world is instantly put into perspective and you suddenly realize that the insignificant worries you may have had today are irrelevant when it comes to the “big picture”. You recognize, for quite possibly the first time in your life what “forever” really means and how unimportant yesterday has become, and how promising tomorrow can really be. My family has told me for as long as I can remember that the possibilities are endless, but I could never really wrap my head around the scope of “endless” until right now. As I lied in the snow it occurred to me that if I recall correctly and depending on the dictionary that you are sighting, “Space” has many definitions. Among the definitions are two that seem to pertain so perfectly to this moment. One involves space being the region beyond earth that contains all celestial bodies (the concrete definition) and the other, slightly more abstract, refers to a persons freedom to assert a personal identity and fulfill personal needs. What do ya know, here I sit, captivated by this region beyond earth, and it is here that I have found my own personal “space”. I have lived through many things that I have always felt are a part of who I have become, but it these moments that I am convinced will start to define the person that I am. The ultimate self-discovery…

It is also in these moments that I so vividly remember the days that my amazing mother and I would lie under trees and stare up at its branches, and its leaves, and the blue skies that would manage to find their way through the clouds. Those have been some of the most peaceful moments in my life…and those are the moments that I would return to when the superficial turmoils of everyday life could sometimes seem too much to handle. My mother taught me how to recognize tranquility and the beauty in the stillness. I grew up watching my mother battle what sometimes seemed like the wickedest of battles with the most resonating semblance of calm and peace. She has been my rock for so long, my angel, and an amazing teacher. If only my mother could see this now…the ultimate of “happy places”. I think this moment will quite possibly be a reference point for me from here to the end of my time. Every bad day, pity party, and frustration will be answered with this memory. Because there is no way that a recollection of a sight like this could ever end in anything but a positive resolution. A lifetime of positive resolutions…what a wonderful life…and I owe it to her…

Thank you so much momma for teaching me to recognize the simplest of pleasures in life… I love you, I miss you, I’ll be home before you know it.

Photo Courtesy David Stylianou (Castle Rock)

 

 

 

Yearning for bordum...

Having been here now for about a month and looking back to when I was preparing to leave the states, I find it humorous that many people asked, "But what will you do down there? Wont you get bored?"...

Oh how I wish!! How I wish I could relax for a long enough period of time to get bored...how WONDERFUL that would be. Instead my social life has done the exact opposite, and I find myself going from dawn until dusk.
Ten hours of work keeps me pretty busy from 6 am until 4pm, and then with what little energy I can muster, I manage to top off the night with everything from driving shuttles and calling bingo numbers to spending time in the craft room or watching Science lectures in the Galley...and so it goes...I have been so concerned with doing everything that I can here, that it is often very easy for me to forget how much I really do like to be alone... and "alone" is becoming next to impossible. Its hard to believe that my tolerance level for people seems so low at times with a little over 500 people here, and in another month we are going to more than double that number...YIKES...

All that being said, I am going to attempt (attempt is the key word), to conduct my own personal experiment. As often as is possible and when there is an internet connection available I will record among other things, the weather, the population, and my tolerance for people on a scale of 1 to 10. 10 being that I love the human race and 1 being just short of misanthropy.

So to start my experiment off right, the stats are as follows-
Weather: I didn't check the actual numbers today 
Number of days on ice: 29
Population:526
Tolerance for people: 9


The population starts to grow in the coming weeks...let the good times roll

"Things I have learned from asking stupid questions..." #516

"Hey Ryan, have you been outside today? How cold is it?"

"Hmmm...last time I checked Jess, we're in Antarctica...soooooooo lets just stick with really cold"

Good Call!! I suppose once the temperature drops below -30 the numbers just don't really matter that much any more...

Hydro Ceramics technician supervisor…

That’s the new job title…and if that wont look good on a resume, nothing will! To take it one step further I am a Hydro Ceramics Technician Supervisor aiding the NSF in the advancement of American technology and science. Sounds pretty important right? I thought so!!

There are no windows in my room so I was sure that getting up for work today would have been difficult (not that having a window would have made a difference…as of today, this continent still only sees about 3-4 hours of light a day and the sun has not yet peaked over the horizon) but it turns out that over-sleeping was not the problem but rather getting any sleep at all was the battle to be won. Even with the serious amounts of jet lag I was trying to overcome, sleep was the last thing on my mind. I felt like a child on Christmas Eve who subconsciously fights the heavy eyelids in anticipation of the day to come…and oh what a day it was.

We had yet another orientation this morning to cover more safety issues and all of the typical “welcome to your new home” discussions that I had expected. That was followed by quite possibly the most surreal and eternally memorable “tours” I have ever had. I took a “dirt” tour of the base, which could only be compared to a tour that a high school senior might take of a college campus.

“To your left is the gym, and over here is the Galley. The building in front of you is the medical building and the building to our right is the bar…that over there is the coffee shop, you will pick up your mail in building 140 and that way out in the distance is Hut Point…………………….”

We could have been following the yellow brick road to Oz for all I knew…or cared for that matter

Every word that came out of his mouth was supplemented, in my head, with “in Antarctica” and every time my brain recited that line the smile on my face grew bigger and bigger, much like that same child on Christmas morning who cant open their gifts quickly enough…

“To your left is the gym, and over here is the Galley…”

“…In Antarctica”

The building in front of you is the medical building and the building to our right is the bar…”

“…In Antarctica”

“That over there is the coffee shop”

“…In `Antarctica”

“You will pick up your mail in building 140”

“…did I mention that I’m in Antarctica?”

“…and that way out in the distance is Hut Point…………………….”

“HOLY HELL, I’m in ANTARCTICA”

I’m in that place that you only learn about a few times as a child. Maybe once in second grade when you learn about the continents and perhaps a couple of more times throughout middle school and high school if you’re lucky…You learn that its composed of ice and snow and that it sits at the bottom of the globe. You learn that its cold……….

but then the more you learn about other places in the world the more you forget about this cold rock. Before you know it, Antarctica is a place that you only read about in books and occasionally hear about in passing…No one ever travels there, no one ever talks about wanting to travel there (at least no one in their right mind) and when it comes time for a vacation you never hear people suggesting Ross Island or the Pressure Ridges. Even as the world becomes smaller thanks to technology, there is just something that remains so far away and so out of reach about Antarctica…8000 miles out of reach…

 It becomes impossible to view Antarctica as an actual place because going there seems impossible…

And here I am…

I wish I could say that the views have been amazing, but I cannot. What I have seen has been breathtaking but the majority of it has been in the dark. The few hours of light I saw today was witnessed from inside the Galley, working…while, initially, I was bummed, I have said from the start that I feel like the work will be a small price to pay for the fact that I am here in this amazing place.........................................................................................................................................................

Today, I made history...

I was the 5th person who stepped off the 1st C17 night flight (when they turn out all of the lights and land the plane using night vision goggles) that has landed in Antarctica with passengers on it!!! And I think the pilot took a wrong turn! I’m pretty sure that we just landed on the moon.....................................

I don't know what the temperature was so lets just stick with REALLY COLD! The wind was blowin, the snow was flyin, and anywhere else in the world this would be considered miserable circumstances...but tonight? Tonight they're perfect

Courtesy of Ryan Biegen

Hurry up and wait and wait and wait...

I’m still here!! As much as I have fallen in love with this country this is officially bumming me out…not even cause I’m stuck here but rather that they have us so tightly tethered to our hotel rooms awaiting information that we couldn’t really go anywhere if we wanted to…its ok though, they give me more money every day and I am not one to turn down free money…

The plane is fixed, now we’re just waitin on weather! Everyone keeps telling me that we’ll prolly be stuck till Monday at least, because they won’t fly on Sundays. Something tells me though that tomorrow is the day. Every day that we get pushed back the flight that comes after us gets pushed back and then the flight after them and on and on it goes. At this point I would say that Christchurch’s population has greatly increased because of the stranded soles waiting to hitch a ride south. They have doubled some people up in rooms as some of the hotels have no vacancy, because all of their rooms are filled with US!

The rumor is that after a couple of more days they will stop worrying about the order that we were intended to arrive and start loading the flights based on importance…apparently people need to eat almost as much as they need medical care, so if it comes down to that the DA’s and the medical staff will be flying together. So I will get there eventually.

We were ready for Antarctica…they just weren’t ready for us…

I woke up this morning sad that I didn’t get to spend as much time in New Zealand as I would have liked but excited beyond words that in only a few hours I would be in a place that some people only dream about. It was a pretty laid back day. I got up, got dressed, had breakfast, walked around town…really nothing to write home about, just enjoying the time I had left in Christchurch. We had to be at the CDC by noon to get dressed, check our bags, “weigh in”, and be ready to fly by 3pm (I realize that this task sounds easy, but rest assured its not) I spent about 35 minutes getting dressed …

(right now, the people who know me the best are wondering what set today apart from any other day…I would like to let you know that this 35 minutes did NOT include showering, doing my hair, putting on make-up, etc. It was really just 35 minutes of putting on layer after layer of heavy clothing [for those of you who need a visual, I refer you to the movie A Christmas Story…just look for the kid who’s bundled up and you will instantly understand the task I was faced with]),

Once dressed we had to move all of our bags through a long line to get them weighed and checked, get our boarding passes, and then we ourselves had to be weighed holding all of our carry on bags and wearing all of our ECW (again this may sound like a simple task, and for most it was, but as we all know I prefer to do things the hard way...looking like an idiot makes me feel like I get more out of the experience.) I proceeded to carry, drag, push, pull, and roll all 300 lbs of myself, my luggage, my carry on, and excess clothing out of the building and to the end of a 120 person line, only to discover upon arrival that the majority of my fellow “ice” peers were all rolling their luggage on very convenient little carts…I’m sure you are all wondering where those carts must have been because that’s exactly what I was wondering at that moment…Well, it turns out that they were so conveniently stored inside the entrance of the building from whence I just came. I have tried to convince myself that they were, in fact, NOT there but had been completely used up by the time I passed his particular part of the building (at least that makes me feel a little better about myself). Luckily, someone turned over their cart to me once they were finished using it (again, to boost my self-esteem, I have convinced myself that this person just did it out of the kindness of their heart and not because I looked so pitiful that they felt bad for me…either way, the cart made the next 100 feet far more bearable)

Here I was 2 hours since my time of arrival at the CDC and 6 hours from my first steps in Antarctica and I was already exhausted…but all of the hard work was for a good cause…………..or so I thought.

We sit down to listen to a lecture from one of the flight crew who gave us the run down of how the next 6 hours should have worked out. We then watched a short video on weather and safety in Antarctica, which was then followed up again by the same gentleman who started us off. However, instead of pointing us in the direction of the busses that would take us to the C17, he informed us that we would not be flying today, and very casually informed us that the plane was “broken” but would be fixed by tomorrow (BROKEN??? I personally felt that this was a very risqué choice of wording but everyone reassured me that it was common…WAIT! COMMON??? Since when is a “broken” plane common? What have I gotten myself into?..............)

So now in order to know the rest of my day you would then read this entire narrative backwards (minus carrying all of the bags which at this time had been permanently checked…all I had to worry about was my carry on and my boomerang bag). I gave my boarding pass back, I carried the bags I had, back into the other building, I undressed and headed back to Christchurch. The downside? No Antarctica today. The upside? The dress rehearsal (as everyone has been so fondly referring to it) was just enough practice for me to smooth out the kinks and tomorrow I’ll look like a pro (and maybe everyone will get so drunk at the Rugby game tonight that no one will remember tomorrow, how ridiculous I’m sure I looked today) Oh, and one more upside? I’m still in Christchurch ☺ Love it!

P.S. One more upside that just occurred to me? I didn’t have to fly into one of the world’s most desolate and weather tormented continents on Friday the 13th

“Things I have learned from making stupid mistakes” #397:

When traveling internationally it is often advised that you research the customs, common greetings, etiquette, etc. of the particular cities or countries that you may happen into. As I discovered today it may also be advisable to learn about common pastimes and cultural passions for the country in which you are traveling…

this way, when you are walking down the street with a group of  intellectually sound individuals and you see a huge sign in the window of a restaurant that states “ALL BLACKS” you do not stop the entire group in the middle of the busy street to, very loudly and dramatically, inform everyone within a 40ft radius, how astounded you are, that such a seemingly delightful country would practice such an archaic theory as segregation!!

As it turns out, the odds are pretty high that the country you are in, IS in fact delightful and they DO NOT practice segregation, but rather “All Blacks” is actually the name of their very much beloved and very successful Rugby team… the odds are even higher that when you make such a mistake, while the laughter of your peers will eventually die, their constant need to remind you may last slightly longer…just something to keep in mind.

I fell in love today...

...with Sumner, New Zealand...

All I really wanted out of this whole trip was to see everything that I could, do everything that I could, and experience everything that I could...After all, my destination is Antarctica, and at this point in time in my life I cant imagine many things I could do that would be much "crazier" than this... that being said, I must admit that I threw caution to the wind today, as did everyone I was with...and it also needs to be said that it was worth it... and at the risk of being completely cheesy, it changed my life - I feel like I am a far different person now than when I woke up this morning. If I turn around now, this trip will still have been worth EVERY minute...



Even though the better half of my morning was spent trying on all of the clothes that were issued to me, to take to the ice, I still had more than enough time to see more of New Zealand, and I wasn't gonna miss out. So 3 of us "first timers" commissioned a fellow DA (Chris) who had been to Christchurch before to take us out to Sumner - a little beach town that was no more than a 15 minute bus ride from the center of Christchurch...

(P.S. Amazing metro system!! The Kiwis have it down! You apply for a bus pass, which takes all of 5 minutes, then you put $10 towards activating it...it costs $2.30 to take the bus just about anywhere, and they wont charge you more than twice in a 24 hr. period...so for $4.60 you can ride the bus all day. But the icing on the cake? The card NEVER expires!! I can come back in 10 years and my card will still be honored. Now that's what I call fancy)

On the bus to Sumner, a Maori gentleman, who none of us had ever met, let alone seen, before walks up to us and politely interrupts our conversation. After making small talk about whether or not we were students, and why we were in the country, he invited us to his house for tea (people still drink tea?), and told us along the way that he would show us around. Never thought twice about who we were or any intentions that we might have...he just invited 5 total strangers into his home... In this day and age I would have to say that he was the epitome of generosity and courage.

On a more depressing note, I am sad to say that at first, we were not as welcoming to the invitation as we should have been, but after considering that the numbers were in our favor we obliged. Even more embarrassing for myself, was that the entire way to this man's house my brain was occupied with scenes from the movie Taken ...

I remembered watching that movie and rolling my eyes the entire time, thinking, "HA...that would NEVER be me...I would never wander off with a stranger in a foreign country...are people really THAT stupid??!!"

hmmm...wait a second, what's wrong with this picture?.............WTF happened to my arrogant opinion on foreign generosity??!!...the entire time I'm following this guy, I'm rolling playbacks of this twisted movie in my head...But my feet kept following a man, I HAD NEVER MET, into his home, IN A COUNTRY THAT I HAD NEVER BEEN TO BEFORE!! Roll out the red carpets my friends... Taken 2: The girl who saw the first movie and was still stupid enough to wander into a stranger's house is gonna be a HUGE hit in Hollywood!

And to really ice my cake of doubt, I had to climb, what I'm pretty sure, was somewhere in the ballpark of 150 stairs, through bushes and grass and mud, wearing my gym shoes and carrying an unnecessarily heavy backpack to the top of this bluff that appeared to have no end...Great! the last thing I'm gonna do before I become a permanent fixture on the side of a milk carton is exercises??!! NO NO!! This is not the way I'm supposed to go...
Oh and my mother!! If my mother could see me now she would beat back into me, whatever "sense" I apparently forgot on that buss...

So here I am 1 of 5...and convinced that I am the only one with any kind of sense left in me as we press forward...I hung a little further back in case we had to start running, I was seeking out landmarks so I would know where I was if I got lost running for my life...I even waited for everyone else to drink their tea first just to ensure that it hadn't been drugged (unfortunately I was not the only one who had thought this through...no one wanted to take the first sip...so we all sat there in silence until he drank his first)

All my caution and mental preparation...all the worry...and all for nothing...

As it turns out Gashtra (was his name) was quite possibly the nicest, most kind hearted stranger, most kind hearted human, I had ever met...in my entire life.

He told us stories about his family and of Maori tribes, he gave us gifts (some rope that he made from a plant, native flowers that were sacred to the Maori tribes, and liquor for our trip [I realize that liquor isn't quite as "romantic" as the other 2 gifts, but he was dealing with 5 kids under 26, he clearly knew the way to our hearts]) he told us about his own personal journey and while, I don't believe he realized it, he very much helped to pave the way for the journey that we were about to take.

There were moments of awkward silence that turned into hours of amazing conversation...his laugh was painfully genuine, his insecurities obvious, and his honesty refreshing... There were so many different things that we all shared and talked about and all I can really seem to remember is that he came to Sumner, New Zealand with nothing more than the bag on his back...all he wanted was a wife and a family and to be happy (although he felt that was not where his path would lead him...his family was a tribe of warriors and a "warrior" was what he was expected to be), before we arrived he was packing to go spend 3 days with a Maori priestess in hopes of overcoming all of his fears and self doubt, and that he was from the "Universe Te"... but most importantly I remember that he was whole-heartedly welcoming and indisputably kind...

While this experiencing was, as I said before, life changing, it was also violently enlightening...the fact that this experience could make me so happy actually made me sad...

Why do we avoid eye contact with people on the bus and ignore the people we don't know when we pass them on the street?...Why do we tell our children to never take candy from strangers, or help them find their supposedly lost puppy?...Why do we spend so much time keeping ourselves safe from imaginary threats?...

BECAUSE WE SHOULD! Because somewhere along the way terrible things happened...horrible people did unspeakable things and that has led us to view everything as a threat...unfortunately, in this day and age you never know what that threat could be, so...yes, everything is a threat.

BOO...that sucks! I can only imagine the thousands of experiences that are missed because we politely decline invitations and turn down opportunities...and our reasoning, in some cases...even in my case, is based on media and movies...movies that aren't based on fact but on hearsay and speculation and prior cases of similar situations.

The thing that breaks my heart even more? As we began to tell our story to people about this amazing man who welcomed us into his house, they ALL recanted with their own story of strangers showing similar generosity, all of which, however, took place while they were traveling in different countries. Italians will invite you to dinner and Indians will invite you to tea. Nigerians will invite you in and cook for you any time of day in exchange for stories about the place you come from, and Peruvians are just so interested in the person that you are that they will feed you drinks til you see double, just to hear your history. Kiwis want nothing more than to hug you and then buy you a beer and and Australians still pick up hitch hikers...and Americans? Nope, no stories about us... and while I am NOT condoning picking up hitch hikers or inviting complete strangers into your home, I am suggesting some extension of generosity and maybe even a healthy level of curiosity...

All the ranting aside...I could never justify doing for another human being what he did for us...even after a successful visit in this instance, I still believe that I would be too scared to do the same thing he did, for a complete stranger, in the future. BUT HE DID IT...

And I am now better for it...

The rest of our day in Sumner was absolutely perfect...we drank coffee, we walked on the beach, etc., etc., etc. But it just wouldn't have been the same had we not started it the way we did...

I'm in love with this place and with the people and with the way of life. I love the landscape and the towns and the food.

I'm in love with Sumner, New Zealand


"Certainly, travel is more than the seeing of sights; it is a change that goes on deep and permanent in the ideas of living." - Miriam Beard-

Eating dinner off of a stone...

Punishment? More like reward! The stones themselves were heated up to 400 degrees and the meat was raw when they brought it out on the stone... and then you cooked your own meat...DELICIOUS! Lamb, beef, pork, all sorts of fish. Some restaurants even have Kangaroo and you can find lamb chops in any convenience store (much the same way those pathetic excuses for "taquitos" can be found in any 7 eleven in the states). The food here? To die for! The people here? Impossible to NOT fall in love with! The sights? Breathtaking... This may have to go on my list of potential places to live in the future.

Hotel "So Freaking Awesome!!"

They are putting me up in quite possibly the coolest hotel ever!! Its called the "Hotel So". Super small, but very modern! I must admit that it was a little rough trying to drag all of my bags into such a small space but as soon as I got situated and figured out the bells and whistles, it turned out to be one of the most efficient uses of space that I have ever seen...THERE IS EVEN MOOD LIGHTING IN THE SHOWER!!

(I, personally, chose purple...my shower singing is horrific, but something about purple made me feel like I was in a cabaret, singing to people who actually wanted to listen to me. On the downside, about an hour later I could hear the people in the room next to me speaking at, what seemed to be, a normal level. So, I'm sure, that what I felt to be a profound preformance, when translated through a wall, probably sounded more like a dying cat...nonetheless, I recommend the mood lighting!!)

The bed is floating...yes - floating - on a cloud of blue light. The t.v. acts not only as a source of visual entertainment, but also as a digital fireplace (minus the heat), a view of the beach or mountains -which ever you may prefer at the moment - and as part of one of the most effective alarm clocks I have ever used...

(there is a bright light that slowly turns on over your bed, to emulate sunlight, and then the television turns on to the beautiful sight of the sunrise, provided by the camera on the roof of the hotel, accompanied by one of the catchiest "wake up"tunes that I have ever heard [not quite as effective as my personal fav, "I'm alive, awake, alert, enthusiastic", but it did the trick] ...first time in my life that I didnt hit the snooze button 15 times)

Quite frankly, stepping into room 437 felt more like boarding a space craft then entering a hotel room. Now all they need to do is replace the elevators with teleportation devices... beam me up, Scotty.

I gotta give credit where credit is due...if you're ever in Christchurch, this is the place to be!

Boarding the plane :)

P.S. Just an update...I have landed in Christchurch New Zealand and I'm done traveling...well at least for now. Believe it or not, the easiest part of my 28 hour trip was the 14 hr flight. Sat next to an engineer who is returning to "the ice" for his 10th season. Along with being extremely nice, he proved to be very informative as well, which was a huge help (and a relief) for a newbee like myself. After a lengthy conversation with him I actually was fortunate enough to sleep for... drum roll please... 9 HOURS!! That made the long flight very easy.

On the down side th HARDEST part of the journey was actually the first leg. We did not get off to a very good start... to my left was a gentleman who could not sit still to save his life... to my right was a young man who from the looks of it had never been on a plane before. He proceeded from the moment we got on the plane to take pictures of EVERYTHING!! For all of you photographers out there, I'm sure you realize that to have any kind of a picture turn out in such a dark confined space you need to use a flash...well that was apparently the one part of photography that he had mastered...

FLASH, FLASH, FLASH...

When my eyes were closed I felt like i was in a dance club with a mosh pit to my left and strobe lights raging to my right... All I kept telling myself as we were rolling down the tarmac was "its only a 2 hr flight - find your happy place - its only a 2 hr flight". As I began to chant these words in my head, my rythm was broken by the PA system...

"Good afternoon folks, this is the captain speaking, it appears that there is some bad weather en rout to Los Angeles, so at this time they have grounded all flights."

(So I'm thinking, "ok, I guess will have to wait in the terminal for awhile before we can board the plane again." NOT)

" We will remain here until we are cleared for takeoff...um, hopefully it will only be about 20mins."

Smile...all I could do was smile :) Needless to say, I survived, and the rest of the trip was as easy as could be expected. I am now in Chrictchurch and its lovely, wonderful, phenomenal...

140 pounds worth of consolidation...

At the risk of sounding mildly pathetic, I must say, that consolidating my WHOLE life into two bags and a carry on that way LESS than 140lbs is NO EASY TASK!!

HOWEVER, it did make me feel a little better when I did the math and realized that trying to fit 140 pounds of stuff into my three bags would be like trying to fit a square peg into a circular hole... CANT BE DONE!!

So with little more than 16 hours left till I board the flight of a lifetime, I am going to surrender to the beast that is my luggage, sleep in this amazing king sized bed one more time, and have sweet dreams of penguins. Love you all... Love you mommy

Before

After

Bright ideas, rain drops and sushi...

It occurred to me today, as I was sittin in my little hotel room, that the only people (or animals) that probably get sushi in Antarctica are the penguins.... and aside from pizza and macaroni and cheese, sushi is my all time favorite food!! So 6 months without sushi? ROUGH! 

So I had this bright idea...

I'm gonna go eat sushi... easy enough, right? There's apparently a great little place thats walking distance from here so it seemed reasonable. Of course, as is usually my luck, right as this particular light bulb turned on in my head, a large and humbling crash instantly shut it off. Followed by torrential down pour...What now? 

Wait! Bright idea (aka realization) #2... It doesn't rain in Antarctica! RIGHT NOW could be my last time dance in the rain for 6 months... 

Rain drops and sushi? Sounds like my kind of date...wish me luck!  

T-minus 64 hours and counting...

Headed "south" for the winter, but something tells me I wont be sippin on drinks with little umbrellas in them and I wont be hangin out on the beach in my bikini...none the less... BRING IT ON!!